The Feminist speaks

Feminism is defined as ‘an advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds
of the equality of the sexes’. We have to accept that men and women were
made differently and both of the sexes have their own limitations. A more
current definition is that it is a ‘belief that women should be treated as
intellectual and social equals to men; furthermore these people can either be
male or female human beings’.
However somewhere along the line people have come up with the notion that if you
are a feminist, well then you should not expect any chivalry from me thank you very much. If I want to become an Orthpaedician, well then I can very well stop expecting men to open doors for me or ask me out on a date. And if I expect this out of men, then I am being a hypocrite. This is where people have forgotten what the definition of chivalry is.
Chivalry can be dated from the Middle Ages. At those times, it was a method of training and a standard of behaviour for knights in the medieval times. The code of chivalry emphasized bravery, military skill, generosity in victory, piety and very polite and courteous behaviour towards women. Basically your typical knight in shining armour, whom all the damsels would fall for and us as young girls dreamed of coming across (and still do).
As Emma Watson quite rightly said, ‘Feminism and Chivalry are terms that are not mutually exclusive’. Chivalry I think is a form of kindness seen in men and feminism is not some sort of ideology that barbaric women who have not shaved their armpits, yell on top of roof tops, whilst burning public offices down. I do not understand this concept that: for women to gain something good and valid to us, we have to lose other things in the process. Is it such a bad thing to ask for a little respect in the 21st century after years of oppression and suppression?
Then in that case, let us talk about the situation if the roles were reversed. If I opened the door for a man or offered him my seat – wouldn’t I get weird stares? If I asked a guy I liked out on a date or to be my boyfriend – wouldn’t I be told to get some self-respect? If a girl acted like an idiot – oh my goodness how can she do such a thing? Whereas if a boy did so hahaha such a funny and rowdy boy, hahaha yeah it is totally okay for you to be that way, isn’t it? In that aspect, girls have restrictions in this sphere of life as well.
And in terms of the dating experience, everywhere you go in life there are some etiquettes that are followed – be it in the White House, the dinner table, in your relative’s house or even out on a date. It is not a must that it should be done but it is a standard and seen as a respectable and valiant aspect in man. One has every right to go halvsies and to be a jerk as well. Is it so bad to open a door for a person? I can open the door for my girlfriends and not expect a specialized acknowledgment from them.
Hillary Clinton famously mentioned in 1995 that women’s rights ARE human rights and by promoting women’s rights, it is beneficial for the male race too. Yes, a man can wear pink if he wants to. He can be stay-at-home dad if he wants to. He can paint for living if that is what his heart desires. His wife can earn more than him and it is okay.
I feel if I can menstruate and get the hair ripped out of my legs every month (due to some weird notion that girls were born hairless and never develop hair ever!), pump a baby out of me, drape a sari around me every day like it’s nothing and put make up on and be expected to do all this in the same time as a man can, to get ready in the morning and yet still come to work in the morning as fresh as ever and then not have a measly door being opened because it is too much of a privilege for me is just barking up the wrong tree, my friend.
Coming to the topic of mainly female discrimination in the news, well quite simply put we are the weaker race only next to children. People take us for granted and take advantage of us and it is a rampant problem. So instead of questioning the whole concept of feminism, girls and boys let us join forces and stop the brutality towards women.
But then again, what do I know? I’m just a girl.


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